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Thread: The Joke thread

  1. #6201
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    "It's a bit muggy out there." said the husband as he came in the front door.

    "Really? What makes you think that?" said the wife from the kitchen.

    "The group of blacks with knives on the corner."
    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    1657
    1986
    1245
    2011
    1764
    1912

    This is the new Doctor Who trying to park the TARDIS in the year 1826.
    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    Went into the bar the other night and there were a group of fat women sitting talking around a table.

    So, I said to them as I walked past: "Mmmm...this looks like a real heavy discussion going on here."

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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    Last night I was sitting browsing the web on the PC, when the wife walked in and asked me what I was doing.

    "Oh, I'm just looking around for some cheap flights." I replied.

    She got all excited, smiled widely and then came over to my desk, got on her knees, undid my zip, and gave me a tremendous blowie!

    Don't ask me why though. I can't work out why she's so interested in darts all of a sudden.

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    As I arrived at the prison showers I realised I'd forgotten my soap.

    However, I was amazed at the number of bars of soap left abandoned on the shower room floor for no apparent reason.

    "Well, I'll be buggered" I thought.
    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    Sonic screw driver,15 minutes later!


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    Walked into the local "Timber City" the other day, and some bloke came up to me and asked me if I wanted decking...

    Luckily I punched the bastard first before he could make his move.

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    My mates are really annoyed with me right now just because I lost us the pub quiz.

    Apparently the drone ISN'T the national bird of Syria.
    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    When you hear a man use the term "Woman Driver" . . . this is what they are referring to . . .




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    After performing an ultrasound scan, the doctor tells the expectant mother: "I have some good news, and I have some bad news."

    "The good news is that your child will never have a problem finding a parking space."
    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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