Gentlemen,
Just advising you i wont be posting much in the future as i expect to be over whelmed by work prospects
I have reached retirement age and all of a sudden have discovered my career path late in life
A PROFESSIONAL HEAD NODDER
Yep you read right, in Victoria there is currently a State Election in 8 days time. Now the politicians are making untenable promises to get into power, the existing head nodders are now finding it hard to nod their heads due to guilt of not being able to carry these promises through
BUT no problem for me as i am eminently qualified for the job, i am non aligned and have been married 40 years which allows me to nod to any situation under extreme duress and still survive
I would wear a neutral colored suit so i could stand behind any political persuasion and blend in, allowing me to run from press conference to press conference by just changing my tie
My charges are $25.00 plus GST per nod with a minimum of 8 nods = $200.00 plus GST
Additional nods up to 10 will be @ $17.50 plus GST, there after @ $15.00 per nod plus GST
So in the case of the Liberals it would be neutral suit plus blue tie
Labor, neutral suit plus red tie
The Greens would be a rainbow vertical tie due to the fact they are not sure yet what or who they represent
Factions, eg Liberal far right group if nodding for example for Tony Abbott, would be a blue tie with a swastika on it
Labor left wing faction would be a red tie with a yellow hammer and sickle (i expect this to be my most used tie so have bought a dozen)
I also expect my biggest client to be Sarah Hanson Young, because at this stage she is having trouble to get any one to stand behind her, and especially to nod in agreeance, in this case i wont be wearing a tie but a workers scarf with pictures of Lennin, Marx etc embroidered on it to represent the oppressed
When representing Liberal, i will be facing right, Labor i will be facing Left, Greens, i will be looking at my feet and poor Sarah, i will be looking up into the sky
Independents, i will be wearing a white tie to represent capitulation, and nodding with my back to the cameras
Independents get a discounted price due to their low budgets
Unfortunately i could not get a contract with One Nation as they said they had plenty of people from far Northern Queensland who would nod their heads to any thing
So i think i have it all covered, am so confident of my success that i have ordered an AMG Mercedes 4 litre twin turbo as my work vehicle to allow me to get from one press conference to another quickly, luckily at the moment have only 2 demerit points but expect to increase them dramatically around election time
Ok, look out for me on the tv news, i will be the one on the RHS nodding to the most preposterous statements coming out of politicians mouths and seemingly agreeing with them with out a conscience
Wish me well in my new career path
Allover
There is a fine line between "Hobby" and "Madness"
Look Here -> |
I wish you well in your new vocation , do you have a preference to a particular tv station or are you completely ambedextorous in this regard , However I have doubts that the amg will be able to keep up with the situation therefore I would suggest that an escort of bikers may be to your advantage , I assume that you have grey hair to suit as well as glasses to look as though you may know where you are , please dont forget the occasional hand gesture and the half smirk that is characteristic of the head nodders . Other than that the best wishes on your future vocation and I look forward to seeing the wave
regards
allover (17-11-18),gulliver (17-11-18),Uncle Fester (17-11-18)
Sounds like a cool job but I would be a little concerned about the competition.
Every time I lower myself to view a politician making statements I already see some bobbleheads behind them.
Maybe those are the mysterious 1 million jobs that the Coalition claims to have created.
As a work vehicle I would suggest the latest top end Tesla in ludicrous mode to get there before the competition, so fast and quiet nobody will notice, maybe not even members of the law enforcment.
Update: A deletion of features that work well and ain't broke but are deemed outdated in order to add things that are up to date and broken.
Compatibility: A word soon to be deleted from our dictionaries as it is outdated.
Humans: Entities that are not only outdated but broken... AI-self-learning-update-error...terminate...terminate...
As a work vehicle I would suggest the latest top end Tesla in ludicrous mode to get there before the competition, so fast and quiet nobody will notice, maybe not even members of the law enforcment.[/QUOTE]
I have taken note of this suggestion and will take it on board
Any suggestions from members will be taken into consideration
There is a fine line between "Hobby" and "Madness"
hinekadon (17-11-18),Uncle Fester (17-11-18)
I wish you luck in your new endeavor allover
Just make sure you wear the best possible ear muffs to protect your ears and your mind from the mindless babble of lies you will be subjected to
Update: A deletion of features that work well and ain't broke but are deemed outdated in order to add things that are up to date and broken.
Compatibility: A word soon to be deleted from our dictionaries as it is outdated.
Humans: Entities that are not only outdated but broken... AI-self-learning-update-error...terminate...terminate...
hinekadon (17-11-18)
I've become a bit of a head nodder myself, but that's just me nodding off to sleep more often these days. retirement will do that for you ;-)
My problem is I have to also say, "Yes dear" because SWMBO is usually in another room and gets annoyed if I don't respond.
I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
eaglem (20-11-18)
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