A man, a dog and a pig are stranded on a deserted island after surviving a shipwreck.
The man and his animals have plenty of food and resources to survive, but after a while the man starts to feel sexually frustrated.
One day he decides to take his sexual frustration out on the pig but the dog does not like what he sees and so he bites the man every time he try's to hump the pig.
The man even tries to lure the dog to one side of the island, so he can run back and try to relive his frustration on the pig, but the dog keeps running back just in time to stop him from having sex with the pig.
Until one day a beautiful woman washes ashore on the island but she is lifeless and the man successfully revives her through CPR.
Being so grateful that she was brought back to life, she tells him " thank you so much for saving my life, I owe you everything and will do anything you ask, to return the favor of saving my life".
The man kindly rejects the offer but she is persistent and continues to tell him " please let me repay you, I will do anything you want"
Then the man ask "anything? Really?" She says "YESS!, anything you want" The man is now convinced that she will do anything to repay him and so he tells her
"You see that dog? Go take him for a walk"
I'm NOT f*cking stupid!
Well....not any more. We're divorced...
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
An old cowboy walks into a barbershop in Darwin for a shave and a haircut.
He tells the barber he can’t get all his whiskers off because his cheeks are wrinkled from age.
The barber gets a little wooden ball from a cup on the shelf and tells the old cowboy to put it inside his cheek to spread out the skin.
When he’s finished, the old cowboy tells the barber that was the cleanest shave he’d had in years, but he wanted to know what would have happened if he had accidentally swallowed the little ball.
The barber replied, “Just bring it back in a couple of days like everyone else does”.
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
So isn't.... This is....
Last edited by ol' boy; 08-03-19 at 11:26 AM.
If u want to go on an expedition get a Land Rover, if u want to come home from an expedition get a Landcruiser!
Dog; "My human feeds me and love me and takes care of me. He must be a god". Cat; "My human feeds me and loves me and takes care of me. I must be a god."
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
International Womens Day was on the 8th of March.
Not to worry guys, ours is coming up on April 1st.
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.
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