Thread: The Joke thread - Some jokes may offend, read at own risk. Jokes only, no comments.

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    Paddy's boss gave Paddy a tin of green paint and a brush and told him to go to the boss's house and paint the porch.

    Half a day later, Paddy returned with an empty paint tin.

    Paddy's boss asked "Well now Paddy, did ye finish painting the porch?"

    "Sure did boss, but it wasn't a porch, it was a Mercedes."
    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    Last edited by lsemmens; 21-08-20 at 08:13 PM.
    I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...

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    Mac King’s infamous rope trick.

    Las Vegas magician Mac King has a trick that’s so notoriously difficult to figure out, even Penn and Teller have admitted they have no clue how he does it.


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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    Death smiles at everyone. Grumpy old men smile back.

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    The wife has stood by me for 40 years. Through my alcoholism and drug and gambling addictions, through many affairs, bouts of VD and, most recently, throughout my rape trial.

    Can someone please tell me what the f*ck I've got to do to get RID of her?
    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    Death smiles at everyone. Grumpy old men smile back.

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