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Thread: The Joke thread - Some jokes may cause offense, read at your own risk

  1. #9041
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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    Tiger Woods was in Oz and was driving to a regional area to play a charity golf game.

    He stops for gas at an old-style service station in a small country town.
    When he gets out of his late model, stylish European car he sees he is being served by an elderly gent in heavily soiled overalls.

    Before he gets to pump gas, the old-timer saw that a golf tee fell on the ground when Tiger got out of the car.
    As he goes to give it back to the new arrival in the flash car, he asks what is it for.

    Tiger says, "Well that's what I put my balls on when I'm driving".

    "Aw shucks," says the old guy, "Those people at Audi, they think of everything!"

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  • #9045
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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    I was in a pub in far Western Queensland last Saturday night,

    when this really brutally ugly girl came up to me,

    squeezed my arse and said,

    "Give me your number, sexy."





    I replied "Have you got a pen?"

    She smiled and said "Yes."

    I replied,

    "Well you better get back to it, before the farmer notices you're missing."

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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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  • #9048
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    Heard on the radio today where a bloke signed up for one of those dating apps and they matched him up with his wife!
    I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...

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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    The fact that there's a highway to hell and a stairway to heaven says a lot about the anticipated traffic flow.

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    3 bits of steel, how hard can it be....

    If u want to go on an expedition get a Land Rover, if u want to come home from an expedition get a Landcruiser!

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